Tag: book-review

Facing new decisions with caregiving, I mentally said, “I need help,” and thought of this cute photo. This child’s face could be my own expression. But now I know help in many and various ways.

“Help” moved me to think of The Pilgrim’s Progress where Pilgrim was stuck in the bog and Help, a person, came to get him out. Help asked, “But why did you not look for the Steps?” with Bunyan’s biblical reference: “When I was in great need, he saved me” (Psalm 116:6).

Pilgrim’s help was available in the steps that would rescue him from the Slough of Despond. Once out of the bog, Help bid him to continue on his way, but first Pilgrim asked why the Slough of Despond was placed along the Way. I relate this tale in my book, Journey with Bunyan’s Pilgrim, and add my takeaway:

“Pilgrim’s question is also one I might ask. Why would such a place of mud and mire be left to hinder a Christian along the way of salvation? The answer Bunyan gave by way of Help can be borne out in my own experience. . . . Asking for help hasn’t slowed down my process but instead given answers to speed me on my way.”

Why do I need Help now? Bill’s Alzheimer’s disease has moved into the advanced stage, and we need to examine Steps to make life easier for him and us as caregivers. Becky, Paul and I talked about next Steps. At first, options included: (1) Changes in furniture and equipment such as a hospital bed and wheelchair, requiring that we move current furniture; (2) Senior Care in-home personal care from a local agency; (2) Move to a memory care unit in an assisted living facility. All are good and cost factors vary. What do we do next and what benefits us best?

While researching the options, we turned to another not exactly on the original list. We have chosen Hospice in-home care, and it’s been the right decision. That means end-of-life care, an honest evaluation. In two days Bill was evaluated and signed up because of two main criteria: lack of mobility and poor communication. A hospital bed was ordered and assembled in our bedroom; a schedule of helpers arranged; and the care we needed lined up. The first day on the schedule brought to our home: RN case manager, social worker, chaplain, and an aide. Each performed suitable and needed tasks with professional skill and gentle care. Of course, I still rely on our daughter with her nursing skill and our son-in-law with his good ideas and encouragement. Many friends and family members have sent loving notes of concern and prayers. Above all, we are grateful for our Lord’s help.

Help is available, and we have followed God’s guidance for the best Steps to take.

Title Page, early edition from the Religious Tract Society, London

In The Pilgrim’s Progress, John Bunyan’s Pilgrim saw the grim reality of what his decision meant to leave a city in ruins, but his main concern focused on salvation, safety now and for eternity. He decided to leave home in search of redemption, as he invited those whom he loved to go with him. When none would go with Pilgrim, it came to a parting of their ways.

“Now he had not run far from his own door, but his wife and children perceiving it, began to cry after him to return” (p. 4, Barbour edition). This scene was based on Lot’s exit from Sodom and the warning the angels gave his family.

“As soon as they [the angels] had brought them out, one of them said, ‘Flee for your lives. Don’t look back, and don’t stop anywhere in the plains’” (Genesis 19:17),

Here Bunyan also introduced the cost of discipleship. If we are not willing to leave mother and father, wife and children, any family member, we cannot follow Christ. (See Luke 14:26, 27.) This reminds me of a seminary student we met years ago.

The student served Bill and me a simple meal in his seminary apartment, but his testimony became the main course. He had come from an Asian country to Kentucky, USA, for ministerial studies, and at quite a cost. He could no longer claim family as his own, for once he declared his allegiance to Christ, his parents disowned him. In a personal way, he introduced me to the persecuted church.

Something for you to think about: Was your conversion viewed by family with joy or disdain? How did that affect your commitment?

~ excerpt from Journey with Bunyan’s Pilgrim by Ann L. Coker