Heart of a Pastor

Monday 2/4 – I feel that my “sermon” yesterday was a bust. Speaking on Scripture, I tried to layout what the Bible is (the story of Man & of God’s Redemption of Man), what we should understand in approaching it (linguistic, literary, historical contexts), and how to read it (open heart, seeking mind), critically, interacting with the text; interpretatively (recognizing cultural differences & relating principles to our circumstances) & depending on the Holy Spirit to illuminate the text.

I was too long (as usual) & I don’t think I was able to communicate what I was trying to get across. I really feel that my academic interests keep me from good sermonizing. People are not interested in those things; just how to live.

I have asked the Lord to open some door of service where I can do more of what I’m capable of doing and will do less damage to the church. Or perhaps the better thing would be for me to retire & let WGC find the person who can help them “grow.”

Tuesday – How many times have I felt like I did yesterday!! This a.m. I know that one sermon doesn’t provide a reason to rearrange one’s life. I think of Paul’s statement in 2 Cor. 4:9 – “we are knocked down but not knocked out.” So I’m getting back up, and at age 66 I’m asking the Lord Jesus for three things:

1. His Spirit to enable me to see Scripture more in its narrative form & not simply from a grammatic-historical perspective. (Maybe that means I need to stop underlining words, etc. except as a means for finding a passage later.)
2. Help me with this 30 minute rule by “freeing me” from the need to tell everything I know and focusing in on the point that I want to communicate.
3. To stop my hand from jerking when I write, so that I don’t need to be so slow & deliberate when I write. This primarily for the sake of time & legibility. (Unless this problem has a greater purpose – to remind my whence I’ve come & how my bout with depression has been used to awaken me spiritually.)

William B. Coker, Sr., found in his journal of 2002. I’ve left all his punctuation and structure.